I’m on my… uh… who knows cup of tea for the day and since I’m in the midst of not really doing anything important, I figured it would be nice to sit down yet again and have another chat with everyone. So, let’s do this!
-sip of anticipation-
TOPIC I: CHANGES
So, if you read my last post about my Florida trip (which you can read here if you’d like c: > https://kateothegreato.wordpress.com/2017/02/10/a-week-back-home/#more-339 ) then you probably know I mentioned the fact that my physical appearance is, well, quite different from when I first started this blog.
In the past, usually when I was undergoing rough patches, I’d distract myself by changing
at least one aspect of myself drastically. (ex.: Cutting all of my hair off right at the end of my junior year in high school.) However, this time, my motivation wasn’t fueled by the hope of feeling better: merely, I’m starting to grow into my own shoes finally. I’ve always had trouble with self-identity: I went through so many stages of trying to figure out who I am, and my personality has been all over the map since my pre-teen years. It wasn’t until senior year ended that I started to focus more energy on finding out more about who I am. This may just be a phase among the others, but for now I am so incredibly comfortable with who I am/how I look. More than I have been in the past.
-sip of self confidence-
TOPIC II: THE WEATHER
I live in Michigan, right? The weather rarely goes above 30 degrees in the winter time. However, this week has been a blessing. Especially today, seeing as it’s 55 freaking degrees outside right now. Brian and I have been celebrating this by spending over an hour on our porch, drinking tea (me, not Brian. He’s more of a whisky guy.) and listening to some good tunes, while just enjoying the sunlight for the first time in ages.
-sip of Voxtrot-
Get it? It’s the Warmest Part of the Winter. It’s a reference.
If you don’t get it, you should definitely give the song a listen.
TOPIC III: SMUDGEY
I don’t think I mentioned this on here yet, buuut a couple of months ago I drew up a cute lil’ smudge stick that has since been made into a notebook! It’s the first time my art has really gotten out there (especially this time, as the store is based in the UK. Go hard or go home, amiright?) and I couldn’t be any more proud of myself. If you’re interested in giving it a look (and perhaps buying it), here’s the link.
-sip of shameless self promotion-
TOPIC IV: DISSOCIATION
This has been something that I’ve struggled with since my freshman year of high school, however in these last couple of years is when I’ve really started noticing it.
Dissociation is something that happens often for me, even in the brightest of times. Which is aggravating. I could be in the middle of Disneyworld and I’d be dissociating, making the memories of that time quite foggy and hard to distinguish from other times. On top of it bugging the hell out of me, it affects those around me. It’s a lot to deal with, and it’s somewhat damaging to the relationships that I have with people (whether it’s intimate or friendship), so it makes me feel all the more guilty that I don’t have more control over it at this point in time. Up until now I’ve been just riding along with it, but now I’m trying to wrap my head around the entire thing and start seeing if I can lessen the ‘symptoms’ a bit.
-sip of determination-
I’m pretty sure that sums up all of the things floating around my noggin at this point in time, so thanks for putting up with my seemingly endless rambling. (●´ω｀●) I’m going to try and keep up posting often – it’s been a week since I posted my last, which is definitely better than a month… or three.
p.s. Hi Sam. >.>